The Night of the Peruvian Cardigan

Sunday afternoon I headed into the city to meet up with two ladies that I met speed dating late last year,  Ms M and Ms A. We had not seen each other since that night, so we grabbed some drinks and got down to catching up on each other’s lives over the past few months.

There was talk of dates, selfies, work, studies, holidays and dance comps. We were deep in conversation as a threesome when this guy approached out of nowhere and said hello. I responded and that may have been my fateful error as he locked onto me and rapid fired conversation at me. In the confusion of this robust conversation Ms M and Ms A assumed that I actually knew the guy and they carried on their conversation to the side.

Fearing that I was losing the group, that I was being separated from the pack like a baby seal being pursued by killer whales, I drew the girls back into the conversation. It seemed at this point that the guy realised that it was about to be game over and clutching at straws he decided to tell us about his cardigan.

Now I had already noticed his cardigan. It was hard not to really. He told us that he was from Peru and it was a traditional Peruvian cardigan.

It was not quite the same as this, but every bit as lame….

ALRBB585_XL

What would go through the mind of a single man who is travelling and out to meet some nice Aussie girls when he decided to wear that??! To a bar!

The cardigan was also really fuzzy and I instantly felt itchy looking at him. I give this guy full credit for having the balls to just walk up to girls in a bar and strike up a conversation, but meeting a man who is obviously highly likely to give me an itchy rash…. pass.

Anyhoo, conversation later turned to comparisons of our dating methodologies. I’m a big fan of Tinder as it seems to be where most of the guys hang out. It’s logic really. It’s free, it’s easy to set up and guys get to look at lots of pics of pretty girls with minimal fuss.

Ms M seemed to favour the face to face interaction of speed dating, which I totally understand but I’ve not had a good experience with speed dating since the very first time I went years and years ago. Ms A favoured other sites like RSVP and POF, which I have gone off totally as they don’t seem to attract new talent since Tinder has been on the scene.

I’m also all about efficiency and have a well honed screening process established. I like to chat in the app once or twice, if that’s good, move to txt, then to talk, then if they pass those selection rounds they get through to the final face to face round. I like this process to take about a week tops, certainly no more than two. I’m into momentum, excitement, I’m very impatient! If it’s dragging out too long I get bored and move along. But Ms A is a very busy lady at the moment and can be talking to guys online for up to 2 months. That’s commitment!

I was discussing this with another friend today, also Ms A, as to who is doing it right. We are all single, so none of us have cracked it. I couldn’t help but think of this ecard during this discussion….IMG_2857

But Ms A said that out of all her friends who are single, I am the most active getting out on dates and the most focused on dating. Yay #winning! Ok no, my competitive streak aside, I challenged her as to if that really matters? It can feel like a quantity over quality proposition sometimes.

Perhaps it is just a numbers game though. You can’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket….

Speed Dating – the Best Way to Meet Chicks

Dating couple scene, love confession

I’ve been speed dating a number of times over the past 6 or 7 years and I’m starting to think I have a memory disorder as each and every time I’ve said NEVER AGAIN afterwards….but there has always been another time. Well, NEVER AGAIN!

Yesterday I just happened to look at a speed dating site and saw that there was a session running that night that had one female place left. I had no plans and it was meant to be a ‘Successful Professionals’ session which sounded right up my alley, so I thought why not?!

I remembered why not when I arrived. Nothing makes you feel more like a giant as a 5’10” woman than speed dating. The event might as well have been a ‘Garden Gnome’ session as most of the men were pocket sized.

There were only two adult sized men there. Candidate No.1 was my first date of the evening and didn’t play his cards close to his chest at all. Our 8 minutes together flew by really quickly and by the end of our speed date he told me that we’d be continuing this chat later when we match. Well, I do like a man with confidence and he did have quite a nice expressionful face, so ticked Yes next to his name on my match card.

The other tall guy, Candidate No. 2 was wearing a bright blue shirt, perhaps to stand out from the crowd. A few years ago when I went to a lunchtime speed dating event, one of the guys was wearing a bright pink shirt. Every girl commented on it and certainly remembered him so it was well played on his behalf. I matched with that guy at that event and later when google stalking him found out he ran some kind of dating coaching business that gives advice to men. So I guess he was at the event for research/practice. We never went out after that….

Anyhoo, Candidate No.2 was quite nice looking with a really cheeky smile and his name was Lachlan. At one stage my psychic was telling me that my future husband was named Lachlan but I’ve never actually dated one, so I thought ooooh here is my chance! The conversation soon moved on to what we did for work and he soon revealed he was an actor with about 4 jobs to support him when he isn’t acting. Hmmmm I hope my disappointment wasn’t too obvious on my face when he revealed that….

But he was nice and funny and I thought I might as well tick his box as a yes.

The rest of the dates were mostly just nice friendly chats. It’s amazing how fast 8 minutes can fly past when on these dates, especially considering when microwaving food 2 minutes seems to take a lifetime! There was a veritable smorgasbord of undesirable men to pick from, ranging from the labourer/landscape gardener with a mohawk (how is that successful professional?? Or the actor for that matter…), to the real estate guy that seemed a little special the poor love, to the guy with the creepy moustache that looked a bit like he would be a rapist.

BUT as always happens to me at this things, I met some great chicks! There were 3 women there that I had some great chats with and they would be awesome wingwomen. So we all swapped numbers and it’s likely I’ll line up a date with them, so the night was not a total bust.

Today when the match email came through from the company, I had matched with Candidate No.1 but the only other guy I ticked out of the 11 guys, Candidate No.2 had obviously not ticked me. Oh well! I don’t have a good track record with actors anyway.

The email also told me that I must have been a good date as over 70% of the men at the event ticked yes to me, so I’m now an ‘Elite’ member. I was feeling pretty chuffed with myself for that….until I realised that most of those guys were complete losers that likely ticked yes to everyone just to give them the best chance possible of scoring a date. They probably play Tinder by just swiping right for everyone too.

But again I have come to the conclusion that speed dating is not for me. Those that have a Top 5 / Top 83 list of criteria for dating will never find success with a generic event like that. After the speed dating wrapped up we all went downstairs and more and more info about everyone came spilling out. Some of the men were serial speed daters having been to many events and Candidate No.1 has 3 children, which you all know I don’t dig at all so I won’t be pursuing that match.

I did search the speed dating company’s website for a session that appropriately met my criteria, but there were unfortunately no ‘Unicorn’ sessions…..