The Nice But Blah One…

Dollarphotoclub_58045195.jpgI haven’t been dating at all lately. I started a new job recently which is keeping me exceptionally busy and I’m like a man in that I struggle to focus on more than one thing at a time…

But I do have a date story from last month that I have yet to update you about. Following on from the time when I got drunk in the bath and fired up the Tinder machine, I also matched with a baldy. Now, I’m generally not that attracted to a bald man, but this guy had a really nice face, lively sparkly eyes and a great smile.

We started chatting and he lived in the west which is usually not my thing either. He also had a job that sounded a bit…..ummmm….low level?! But he was funny and we both liked burgers and binge watching the same TV series. That is enough right? Right?!?!

We discussed my burger hit list over Tinder and he suggested that we meet up for a burger lunch. Sweet! Two birds and all. But all my burger hit list places are near the city and he lived in Parramatta so was not so keen to commute. I somewhat considered this to be a deal breaker as I would drive at least 3 hours for a burger adventure and I would expect that my future husband would share these life values. Which also raised another potential deal breaker as he drove a Camry….apparently a sporty Camry….is that even a thing?? Actually why the fuck did I go out with this dude?? #destinedtofail….

Anyhoo, we agree to meet at a burger place that I like that is kind of between us geographically. He is early and tells me that he will be waiting out the front of the burger place for me. When I arrive I notice that he is wearing exactly the same purple Ralph Lauren polo that he is wearing in two of his six Tinder pics. I am suspicious it’s his best outfit….

I also notice when I go to kiss him on the cheek hello that he is shorter than me. Again. As usual. Fucking hell why do men struggle so much with measurements?!?! He had told me he was 6 foot. I wore flats. You can’t fool me on this dudes!!! I seriously want to take a measuring tape on my next date and measure the guy when he obviously is deluded about his height. They must learn!!

So I already know this is a fizzer, but he really does have a nice face that I’m quite drawn to. We order, he pays and we take a seat. Chat is easy, light hearted and fun. We finish our burgers after about an hour and he asks if I wanted to get another drink or a coffee.

Although I didn’t feel a spark, I was enjoying his company so I say yes. I buy him a coffee and we spend about another hour chatting. I have to run off to do some negotiating on my contract for my new job, so we hug goodbye and say the usual ‘talk soon’ stuff.

He messages me after the date saying he had fun and is keen to catch up again soon. I didn’t feel like I really liked him BUT I didn’t particularly dislike him apart from the shortness, so as usual I decide if he pursues me I would go on another date with him but I won’t be chasing him.

And I never heard from him again. Oh well…

I’m not exactly crying myself to sleep about it. I’m so totally over online dating though. I just can’t be bothered. So hopefully my unicorn will randomly turn up elsewhere. In the meantime, I’ve joined a car club and had my first track day recently out at Eastern Creek. Out of 98 drivers that day, I was one of only two women. I like those odds!!

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10 comments

  1. Kevin · March 20, 2016

    Yeh I dated a fat chick once so I know how you feel.

    Like

    • seriouslysingleinsyd · March 20, 2016

      How unfortunate for you. And her. But everyone is entitled to their own list of deal breakers…

      Like

  2. Dennis · March 20, 2016

    I’e never understood why people lie about age or height on dating sites. an inch or a couple of years…sure…3-4 inches or a decade no. Being bald myself I think bald is perfectly fine. As soon as a few hairs fell out I thought “If there are any other quitters here, you should just go now” and I’ve been bald ever since.

    Sometimes I think we have ourselves to blame though for people lying on their profiles. You pick an arbitrary number and then make a judgement on it. “Oh, he’s 5’11 and not 6’0. Sorry potential life partner! Everything about you seems perfect but ohhhhhhh…so close.”. I’ve always been fascinated by the eye color question on dating sites. Really? Brown eyes is a deal breaker? Maybe that’s why you’re on the dating site. As you say, everyone has the right to their own deal breakers but sometimes the level of detail is more indicative of fears and excuses than actual choices.

    I once had a long on again off again relationship with someone who seemed to have a never ending list of reasons it wouldn’t work and in the end it just came down to an admission of fear. Fear that she would be so happy that her life would fundamentally alter and the adventures she still had a desire to live would be out of reach. We shared a lot of those adventures together anyway and later in life, when we were in an off again phase, she told me she was ready. She wanted to have a lifelong partner and she wanted it to be me. I’d moved on by then. I could have easily spent my life with her but my life was passing too and all of those dreams were mine too. I found someone who wasn’t afraid I might be her last first kiss. I don’t think she really understood that it’s about intimacy and being able to share your life’s dreams and desires with someone else and having them not just accept them but help you fulfill them. Now my marriage is as crazy as any adventures I had with my past lover…we just know it’s going to be a shared life. Not a selfish list of lost opportunities drowned by fear.

    Liked by 1 person

    • seriouslysingleinsyd · March 21, 2016

      Hi Dennis, thanks for taking the time to write and telling me your story. I do understand your point of view and I do hope readers can see that I write a little tongue in cheek. I wouldn’t have even gone on the date with the baldy if I didn’t think my rules could possibly bend. But I do want to feel deeply attracted to a partner and for me chemistry is either there or it isn’t and it wasn’t on this occasion. I’m optimistic my unicorn is just around the corner! I’m glad to hear you’re in a fabulously happy relationship too 😊

      Like

  3. C.G. · March 21, 2016

    Yes, men always always always lie about their height online! Not just on Tinder, but all dating sites I’ve learned. Seriously one of my biggest pet peeves. Just don’t list your height at all if you’re going to add 3+ inches to it!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Shannon Robinson · March 22, 2016

    Funny, I dated a man shorter than me. He was the love of my life. Dated a very long time. I was always under the mindset of, we are all the same height laying down. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • seriouslysingleinsyd · March 22, 2016

      Haha I do understand, but….
      Dated a long time, but no relationship? May I ask what happened?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Shannon Robinson · March 23, 2016

        Yes, dated for 15 years. We met in the military. We did get engaged about 5 months after we met. But my mother and his mother talked him out of it. They thought we were too young (I was 21 and he was 19). Looking back, we probably were. But I was so angry with my mother for meddling! Any who, we broke up in 2001 because he didn’t want to be married. And I guess you can say I finally got fed up. Funny thing is, he’s my best friend. My ride or die. He has been through every major life event since I was 21. And if I called today and said I was in trouble he would be here without hesitation. But I think he is still quite content with being single. So……..I guess we will be friends.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Katelyn Hawkes · March 22, 2016

    I know this story all too well. During my years in college, I’ve been through this same notion dozens of times. I was on Tinder and Plenty of Fish, hoping to find an older, established man in Austin, as all the boys in my college town were, well..BOYS. It used to bother me that I never got a follow up after a first date, even if I wasn’t sure whether I liked the guy or not. But looking back on it, It’s good there wasn’t any follow up. I didn’t want to waste my time with someone I wasn’t 100% into. I never found anyone worth dating during my 5 years in college. It wasn’t until the summer after I graduated that I found my current boyfriend. He was definitely worth all the waiting and tribulations that come with dating in this day and age. Keep putting yourself out there, keep up with the quirks that make you YOU, like driving hours away for a burger – someone will see that & find it worth appreciating 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • seriouslysingleinsyd · March 22, 2016

      Hi Katelyn, thanks for your comment. I love hearing good news stories! I’m glad you found yourself a good MAN! 😊

      Liked by 1 person

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