I’ve been a little quiet on the blogging front lately as I spent most of last week in bed. Not in the sweaty OMG hot sex kinda way, more the sweaty OMG I’m so sick I’m going to die….alone…and be eaten by alsatians in a Bridget Jones style kinda way.
But prior to that I had another incident with a guy that failed to disclose his parental status to me until quite deep into our Tinder conversation. I had asked early on, but in a roundabout jokey way that he either intentionally avoided answering, or perhaps my approach was too subtle.
He was late 30’s, smart, tall, cute and was really into trying new restaurants and even cooking as well. Tick! He was running his own business that he launched originally in Tasmania and he said that he commuted between the Sydney and Tasmania offices every fortnight, but most of his time was in Sydney. I did think at the time that of all the cities in Australia to have offices if you had only two, Tasmania would not be one of them, but it sounded plausible if he was from there… I guess.
After the debacle of the stalker a few weeks back, I was not moving off Tinder with this guy until I knew if he had kids. I directly asked this time, he took a while to answer and then replied something along the lines of ‘well if it’s that important, yes I do have a daughter in Tasmania…..blah blah’.
I was about to hit the unmatch button, but then I had second thoughts. I think the Christmas season makes me
lower my standards more charitable, as around this time last year I decided to give 6’6″ Dad a go. We’d already discussed some of the same restaurants that we wanted to try, so I thought what the hell, we might have a fun dinner together at least.
I was honest and told him that if I saw that he had a child from his profile when flicking through Tinder I would have not swiped right for him, but we were having a great chat so let’s see what happens.
We exchanged numbers and the following night he txt’d about 9:30pm to see if I wanted to chat. Not quite booty call time, so I gave him a call. Turns out he was a little tiddly after being out on a date that night with a Tinder girl that looked nothing like her pics. Thanks for sharing buddy. Ding…am I the next number in queue at the deli counter?? I’ll have that big kransky over there please….
So we were already off to a rocky start and of course it got worse from there. He seemed somewhat nervous and launched into the worst kind of dating conversation in my opinion – asking questions from dating site profiles.
‘So, what do you like to do for fun?’
‘What is your all time favourite movie?’
‘What type of relationship are you looking for?’
Yawn……. So unnatural, so unsparky, so dull.
But the worst part of it was that he wouldn’t let me finish answering any of his questions before interrupting me mid sentence to ask another question! He was conscious of it too as he kept apologising for it.
This is something I absolutely cannot stand. I probably hate it more than people keeping me waiting when they are late. Possibly even more than I hate the smell of mandarins and that is A LOT! I sometimes fake a severe allergy to mandarins to make people not eat the vile things near me….it’s a very, very rare, little known medical condition alright ;p
So after about 20 mins of infuriating conversation I told him that I was really tired and I was going to bed. He apologised profusely for the interrupting and I said goodnight. I thought it was pretty obvious to both of us that the call was the final nail in his coffin, but 30 minutes later he sent me a txt again apologising for his rude behaviour.
And I thought he was smart……