Recently my friend Ms E randomly remembered one of my old dating tales of woe. It is a story perhaps 12 years old, but she still managed to put shit on me about it!
When I was young (and silly) I wanted to see what I’d look like with brown eyes, rather than my blue eyes. I had perfect vision, but went to an optometrist to get some contacts for appearances sake only. I walked in one afternoon without an appointment and tried to see someone.
The customer service guy at the counter was tall, young and chatty. He had a couple of appointments free that day, but nothing for a few hours. He then kindly offered to call a customer who was due in soon to ask if they would come in later so that I could see the optometrist in 30 mins time. Really nice hey! I stuck around and chatted to him whilst I waited and he was really funny and I started to get a crush!
When I returned in a weeks time to pick up the contacts, in my 21 year old mind I had already decided we were a perfect match and we’d get married and have babies and a labrador, so I knew I had to ask him out. Why not hey?
So I got the contacts, paid and as I was about to leave I said to him…
“Hey, you have my number there. If you’d like to hang out some time, I’d love to hear from you.”
Then he replied…. “Thank you, I’m complimented.”
Shot dowwwwwwwwwwwwwwn, in a blaaaaazzzzzze of glory!
Say what?!? That was it. He thanked me for the offer of my eternal love and devotion, but he doesn’t want it?!!
I turned and left the shop as fast as possible. It likely looked like I’d just held them up at gunpoint.
What the hell was he thinking?!?! Everyone knows that the correct way to turn down someone that you are not interested in is to say that you’ve already got a boyfriend/girlfriend, or 100 cats, or herpes.